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Extra Time!

This is a story from the FSF archive – the FSF and SD merged to become the FSA in 2019.

If you’ve ever spent a bored Saturday afternoon in the house over the close season you’ll know that there’s quite literally (as John Motson might say) nothing on TV. Or if there is it’s brain dead fodder of the WHEN ANIMALS ATTACK! variety. Of course animals aren’t the only dumb beings who are both illogically instinctive and unpredictably aggressive. We bring you – WHEN FOOTBALLERS ATTACK!

Now if there’s one place you probably don’t want to lose your mind, break the law, and initiate a one man riot it’s Iran. Someone really should have told John Negodi though – the Cameroonian suddenly decides to attack fans at the end of his club Payam Khorasan’s match. At the present time it’s not clear whether Negodi got an English style 12-match ban or a good old fashioned Iranian hand chopping.

Sometimes the true pro just wants to get on with the game of course and some numpty charging about like a toddler full of cherry cola is always going to get on your nerves. The simple solution? Knee him in the head of course. Problem solved.

Losing your nut can actually make you a legend though, take Temuri Ketsbaia for example. A fairly limited player fondly remembered by the Toon faithful for his ability to totally lose his rag with inanimate objects such as advertising hoardings.

Only a few miles down the road Sunderland’s Frazier Campbell must have though kicking pitchside boards is the way to North East folks’ hearts. Well, it might be if you don’t get your foot stuck in it and end up hopping round like a turnip.

In the UK crazy players normally only have to face red-faced puffed up stewards, so they tend to think they can get away with a bit more. Maybe if they were in Brazil, where a bit of dissent is enough for riot police to attack you with pepper spray, players might think again!

Whether it’s the Cantona kung-fu kick, Lennon viciously headbutting Shearer’s boot, or Hartson hit there’s been some pretty iconic WHEN FOOTBALLERS ATTACK! moments.

Of course THAT Zidane headbutt will take some beating. And did we ever tell you we know someone who owns Marco Materazzi’s old sofa? True story. Friends to the stars, eh? Anyway, until the next Extra Time! why not see how many times you can nut Marco Materazzi?

Highest score wins Fabio Cannavaro’s old footstool.



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