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This week’s ICYMI comes to you from the midweek clash between Sandhausen and Karlsruhe in the German Cup.

Little old Rio Ave shipped four goals away to Portuguese giants Benfica in the Primeira Liga this week despite starting positively and going a goal up. Their keeper Jhonatan didn’t help matters with this catastrophic touch sending them on the way to a dispiriting defeat.

This week’s ICYMI is the most degenerate penalty-taking technique the game has ever seen. Is it ridiculously impressive? Of course. Should the authorities ban it? Absolutely. Down with this sort of thing.

A sublime hit for this week’s ICYMI – coming courtesy of Gonzalo Cañete of Sarmiento de Resistencia in Argentina’s third tier, a reminder amidst dodgy pitches and kids watching atop fences, of football’s simple joys.

Hull City had a bit of a miserable trip last Saturday to Swansea, losing 3-0, although an FA investigation might be in order as it appears someone shot their defender ahead of the second goal. It’s the only explanation…

Weymouth FC’s Ryan Sandford was busy on Tuesday night, away to Bath City, and making more saves in a few seconds than some keepers manage in a full game. Impressive.

Javier Hernández, formally of West Ham United and Manchester United on these shores, has the spotlight of shame shining down upon him this week. With LA Galaxy awarded a penalty and a chance to take all three points from Sporting Kansas in the 95th minute, Javier did not disappoint. Enjoyable groans from the *check notes* Dignity Health Sports Park crowd there.

Servette FC’s Yoan Severin shows us how it’s done this week with a dreadful mix up with his own goalie against Grasshopper in the Swiss Super League. Going to be a long season if this is anything to go by.

Thailand’s League 1 provides the platform for this week’s #ICYMI and taking centre stage is Isaac Honny. The Ghanaian centre-half sent his side on towards a 2-0 defeat with one of the most spectacular own goals you’re ever likely to see.

Looks like the circus was at the Olympiastadion in Berlin this week going by the this laughable passage of play from Hertha Berlin and Frankfurt. Head clown Wilfried Kanga topped off a chaotic first half performance with a truly comical miss from six yards. Let’s blame the heat.

Watford’s Ismaila Sarr has given us an early contender for Goal of the Season with this class strike from his own half against the latest sufferers of Bruceball, West Bromwich Albion. Sarr would later miss a penalty in the same game, which could have given Watford all three points, as a reminder from the universe not to get too carried away.

Day One of the EFL provided us with what could very well be the Miss of the Season. If anything tops Michael Obafemi’s effort for Swansea City come May next year it will have been a very entertaining season.

Our friends in America are getting a chance to see the best European football has to offer thanks to the E̶u̶r̶o̶p̶e̶a̶n̶ ̶S̶u̶p̶e̶r̶ ̶L̶e̶a̶g̶u̶e̶  Soccer Champions Tour 2022. Highlights include Real’s Eduardo Camavinga attempting a Cruyff turn in his own box, gifting the ball to Barca’s Ansu Fati who drags his shot wide. Tickets start at $60.

What is the worst penalty ever taken? It’s a question that is probably impossible to answer. This didn’t stop Chelsea’s Conor Gallagher though, who tried to solve it with a genuine contender for worst-ever with a woeful preseason panenka.

There was a six goal thriller in the J-League this week between Kashima Antlers and Cerezo Osaka and saving a point for his side, tying the game at 3-3, was Brazilian forward Everaldo with a sensational bicycle kick. If you ever see a better one than this, let us know.

This week’s #ICYMI comes to you from the depths of the Norwegian third tier, with relegation threatened Sotra 2-1 down in their visit to Ullern in the 95th minute. The keeper’s gone up for the final minute, and as the ball is sliced up in air Morten Grasmo can’t be thinking about an overhead kick, surely? Well, this Norwegian would…

Brian McCrann scored an absolute worldie in the 7th tier of Irish football this week to win the divisional cup for Boyle Celtic. Great scenes.

Alou Kuol casually dropped this Puskás Award contender during the international break as the Australian under-23s drew with Iraq in the under-23 Asian Cup. A remarkably nonchalant scorpion kick.

Former-Man City and Liverpool forward Mario Balotelli is currently plying his trade with Adana Demirspor in the Turkish Süper Lig and on the final day of the season he racked up five goals during his side’s 7-0 demolition of already-relegated Göztepe. Among his five goals was this absolutely ludicrous step-over-plus-rabona-combo.

FC Alania Vladikavkaz provide this week’s #ICYMI with an ingenious / ludicrous (delete as appropriate) free kick routine that almost, almost pays off. Not sure they can get away with this one again.